Unplugging

This is a really cool blog post that I can relate to

I wish I was a better communicator

I wish I was a better communicator. I wish it was easier for me to relate to people, to meet people, to have meaningful conversations, to love them in a tangable way. I have come to realize that every soul on this planet is a human being just like myself. I think it is so easy to miss that. That other people are just like you. No matter who they are they all have life experiences, joys, things that they like to do, goal, questions, fears, guilt, loves, relationships, etc. I want to meet people at that level. At a human level. We are human beings because we all have these unique charateristics as well as the ability to share them. I think in the letter to the Romans, Paul touches on this idea. He calls us to "Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep. Live in harmony with one another" (Romans 12:15-16 ESV). What if I could do that? I could share life with other human beings. The human life is a constant stream of joys and sorrows and we as people created in the image of God have the ability to share in others joys and sorrows. I have been asking God lately that he could give me tears. I want to weep for sin. I want to weep with those who are hurting. There are so many people in my life that I want to connect with on this level. But I struggle finding the words to say, when to say them, and just the fear of putting yourself out there. I think any form of love takes risk. It is just as risky to love a friend, a spouse, co-worker, or classmate. And again, I think that is the bottom line. We need love, the greatest commandment. I want to love God and have that love overflow into my love for others. I want to strive to embrace the risk that comes with love. I don't think my question of how to communicate better is an answer anyone can give. I need to just try. I need to learn through doing. And God alone will be the source of the love that comes out.

Christianity and Culture

This lecture opened my eyes to something that, if praticed, could radically change the way we live and display Christ to others.

Click here

the restless saint

lost
confused
scared
weak

having drifted
lost his way

thirsty
dry
barren
empty

having forgotten
the living fountain

despair
futility
fear
hopelessness

having no faith
that joy will return

his redeemer calls out
but trust is failing

his father calls out
yet he has forgotten
what it means to live

he fears death
and wonders
will life return?

he takes a shaky step
toward the one who calls him

the weight leaves his shoulders
the hope returns

how could he have forgotten
the life that is his?
how could he have forgotten
his first love?

he listens
to the God who knows his name
and he is filled with joy again

he is humbled
before the throne
of his Lord
his Love
his Life

text and context

This is promo for the 2008 National Resurgence Conference
I post it because I think it talks about something that is very critical.

frustrated

Last night I was very frustrated. I went to scripture to find some encouragement and I ended up reading Galatians and the beginning of Romans. I hate trying to figure out salvation. There are parts of the bible that just do not seem to fit in my understanding of what salvation is and it drives me crazy. I started reading Romans and ended up literally throwing my bible across the room because I was so confused and frustrated. I sometimes just have to wonder how the heck we are suppose to understand the bible. I mean it was written so ridiculously long ago, in a different language, in a different culture and to a completely different group of people that we in the 21st century know very little about. Our only reliable source of truth is the scripture yet I wonder how God expects us to understand it. Our hermeneutics(the art of biblical interpretation) is inherently flawed and no matter how much we fight the baggage we bring into our reading of scripture it is still there to a greater or lesser degree. Most would say that the Holy Spirit guides us in our interpretation which I believe is true yet so many different bible obsessive, Christ loving Christians still can have different interpretations of passages in scripture so I am just perplexed.

I think there are some things about God and even salvation that we were never meant to understand but what about the explanations in the bible that I don't seem to make sense? obviously they are there for our understanding. So what shall we do when those don't confuse us?

a glorious doctrine

The reason I am a protestant is because I believe that the doctrine of the imputation of Christ's righteousness is the only hope for anyone to be saved. I believe this is screamed in the bible. The truth that I am saved by Christ's efforts alone is too glorious for words. I cannot believe in the Catholic doctrine of inherited righteousness, it is just not what I think happened at the cross. I believe that all my righteousness, good deeds, and my perfect obedience to the law that God requires was already done in the life of Christ and that when I stand before God on the day of judgement he will see Christ's life in place of mine. The wrath of God was completely satisfied when Christ died and now God is able to forgive me, a sinner, because justice has been served.

One of my favorite hymns states:
"When He shall come with trumpet sound,
Oh, may I then in Him be found;
Dressed in His righteousness alone,
Faultless to stand before the throne."

DEEP stuff

"...the increase of grace has a tendency another way, to cause the saints to think their deformity vastly more than their goodness: it not only tends to convince them that their corruption is much greater than their goodness, which is indeed the case; but it also tends to cause the deformity that there is in the least sin, or the least degree of corruption, to appear so great as vastly to outweigh all the beauty there is in their greatest holiness; for this also is indeed the case. For the least sin against an infinite God, has an infinite hatefulness or deformity in it, but the highest degree of holiness in a creature, has not an infinite loveliness in it: and therefore the loveliness of it is as nothings, in comparison of the deformity of the least sin. That every sin has infinite deformity and hatefulness in it, is most demonstrably evident; because what the evil, or iniquity, or hatefulness of sin consists in, is the violating of an obligation, or the being or doing contrary to what we should be or do, or are obliged to. And therefore by how much the greater the obligation is that is violated, so much the greater is the iniquity and hatefulness of the violation. But certainly our obligation to love and honor any being is in some proportion to his loveliness and honorableness, or to his worthiness to be loved and honored by us; which is the same thing. We are surely under greater obligation to love a more lovely being, than a less lovely; and if a Being be infinitely lovely or worthy to be loved by us, then our obligations to love him are infinitely great; and therefore, whatever is contrary to this love, has in it infinite iniquity, deformity, and unworthiness." -Jonathan Edwards, Religious Affections

good advice

If you have wealth, do not glory in it, nor in friends because they are powerful, but in God Who gives all things and Who desires above all to give Himself. Do not boast of personal stature or of physical beauty, qualities which are marred and destroyed by a little sickness. Do not take pride in your talent or ability, lest you displease God to Whom belongs all the natural gifts that you have.Do not think yourself better than others lest, perhaps, you be accounted worse before God Who knows what is in man. Do not take pride in your good deeds, for God’s judgments differ from those of men and what pleases them often displeases Him. If there is good in you, see more good in others, so that you may remain humble. It does no harm to esteem yourself less than anyone else, but it is very harmful to think yourself better than even one. The humble live in continuous peace, while in the hearts of the proud are envy and frequent anger.
- (Thomas à Kempis, The Imitation of Christ)

the root of sin

Pastor John Piper of Bethlehem Baptist Church in Minnesota is probably my favorite author/preacher. I love his passion that just overflows in everything he does. One of his most famous books is called Desiring God. In that book he starts with the premise that "God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in him." This statement is probably, if you had to pick one, his single greatest passion. I read Desiring God 2 years ago but I am still pondering that truth all the time.

Just as a warning, I am going to be very open about myself in this post.

If I had to name the one sin in my life that causes me the most grief it would probably be lust. I fight tooth and nail with this every single day. Being a person who spends loads of time on the internet, it is a very difficult struggle. And not only do I struggle with sexual lust, but I struggle with other forms of lust too-such as a lust for material things. I think that covetousness is just another form of lust.

I have begun to notice something about my struggle with lust or even some other sins. I have been pondering and trying to find out why this is such a struggle for me other than the fact that I am sinful and I am a Male. I have begun to notice that the times when I am the weakest to lust in when I am living for an earthly pleasure. That is the reason that I quit playing computer games a week ago because I noticed what it was leading to. I then, yesterday, I returned to computer games and I fell victim to the lie of lust again. Because these games are something I enjoy so much they become my earthly pleasure that I begin to live for. And when I am living for earthly pleasure it is easy to seek other early pleasure. And what greater earthly pleasure is there than indulging our sexuality?

I am going to make a weighty statement. I will venture to say that Any time, anyone puts anything on the throne of their greatest pleasure other than God himself it is Sin. We were designed to find our ultimate pleasure in God and anything short of that is going against how we were created. That is the reason Jesus had to go to the cross; we had to be forgiven for us to have any hope of being able to return the the communion with God we were designed for. Jesus didn't just die to free us from guilt, he died so we could be restored to the relationship with God we could not have in our sin.

In conclusion, I think that the root of sin is our adultery against God. We sin because we are seeking to be satisfied by something other than God. I think that we have to earnestly seek after the goal of finding our pleasure in God alone, this doesn't mean that we can't enjoy some of the good things this world has to offer and that were created by God (God created sexuality but we perverted it) but we must place every earthly thing we enjoy below our desire for God. What kind of message would it declare to the world if we didn't need all the earthly pleasures, that all we needed was Jesus to be completely satisfied.

today was rough

Today was a rough day spiritually for me because I fell to some sin today. I am not fully convinced that Satan didn't have some major part in the horrendous guilt I was feeling as a result. But I really have come to rely on grace and been taught some things through it all. I had my faith tested serverely. I feel that I will come out of this funk I am in having a greater trust in Christ. I just didn't feel like myself today and even though things got better tonight, I still don't feel completely myself again. But I am excited tomorrow, for a new day; a day to be myself again and to wake up tomorrow and seek God's life.

This verse meant a lot to me today:
"The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit;
a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise." (Psalm 51:17 ESV)

Michael Vick's Jury

the worship of knowledge and the lack of wisdom

I don't want to be another person ranting and raving about how this generation's culture is so screwed up, but this is a crazy century; knowledge is something that is everywhere with the Internet and television, so people are learning many things very quickly. It is also interesting that the amount of technical information we have is doubling every two year. It would be a tough argument to say that we are not a smart generation yet I would venture to say that we are definitely not a wise generation of people. Wisdom trumps all knowledge. People don't really care to listen to someone who is smart and knows a lot of facts. But what if we were a culture who was seeking wisdom instead of knowledge, what would that mean?

I have come to realize that, in my own life, I need to be seeking after wisdom. I think that this is a scriptural truth that is so often overlooked. I mean there is a whole book of the bible about wisdom. I love knowledge, its a glorious thing, I love how the Internet makes all sorts of education so accessible. But I also think we can end up going back to the garden of Eden where Adam and Eve had a desire to know what they were never meant to know and it got them kicked out of the garden of Eden and is the cause of of the evil and brokenness we see in the world today. I think we tend to laugh at or ignore wisdom and worship knowledge. I want to find a way to put the brakes on my desire to know and embrace a longing to be wise.

the simple truth

I have realized today that the christian walk at its core is simply about learning to trust and obey God. That is the way that I can draw near to Jesus, I draw near in faith and obedience. Its not about how much time I spend in scripture, or how often I pray, or my list of "good" things I have done for his kingdom. I need to place my hope in the promises of Jesus and obey what the Holy Spirit tells me I need to do. Most of the time the Holy Spirit talks to my through my prayer and reading of scripture but I need to have faith and an attitude of obedience for it to have any real effect.

is this a universal thing?

This is the question that I wish to ask: Does everyone to a greater or lesser to degree have an overarching passion or goal that keeps them going day to day? I know that I have a passion that drives every major decision, but is this true for every human being on the planet?

being totally satisfied

I have to come to the realization this week that my ultimate goal of coming to the point where I am completely satisfied in Jesus alone is much more of a challenge than I thought. I knew it would be hard, but I think I experienced some the difficulty this week and it was harder than I expected. I want to come to a point where I enjoy spending time drawing near to God far more than I desire to do anything else. But I am constantly putting aside my love for Christ for other things. But I have also been realized that I have to rely on Jesus for my ability to draw near to Jesus. Because the truth is the as a flawed, sinful man and the only way I have any hope whatsoever to drawing near to Jesus is through his grace. I need to rely on this for this because, truth be told, my "religion" isn't going to go anywhere by my efforts. My "religion" is all about relying on Jesus for my good deeds and my ability to approach the throne of God. Maybe I am encountering difficulty because a part of me wants to please God by my own efforts, when I can only please God through simply having a child-like faith.

what scripture says about religion

"Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God. Therefore put away all filthiness and rampant wickedness and receive with meekness the implanted word, which is able to save your souls. But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves. For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks intently at his natural face in a mirror. For he looks at himself and goes away and at once forgets what he was like. But the one who looks into the perfect law, the law of liberty, and perseveres, being no hearer who forgets but a doer who acts, he will be blessed in his doing. If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this person's religion is worthless. Religion that is pure and undefiled before God, the Father, is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world. (James 1:19-27 ESV)

"If with Christ you died to the elemental spirits of the world, why, as if you were still alive in the world, do you submit to regulations— “Do not handle, Do not taste, Do not touch” (referring to things that all perish as they are used)—according to human precepts and teachings? These have indeed an appearance of wisdom in promoting self-made religion and asceticism and severity to the body, but they are of no value in stopping the indulgence of the flesh." (Colossians 2:20-23 ESV)

the problem with religion

Spurgeon's wisdom

He who lives without prayer, he who lives with little prayer, he who seldom reads the Word, and he who seldom looks up to heaven for a fresh influence from on high -he will be the man whose heart will become dry and barren.
-Charles Spurgeon

it is hard to follow a 2000 year old radical

I think the roughest part of following Jesus is just the fact that it is so dependant on faith. We no longer have Jesus physically walking next to us. I really wish he was here in person. It is so hard to follow someone you can't see and faith is such a difficult thing to have in the 21st century, it sometimes feels weird telling people that you are pursuing a guy who lived 2000 years ago. I have just learned the importance of prayer and scripture in drawing near to God. I think it is our gateway to a two way conversation and relationship with him. We can hear about God or what he has to say through scripture and then we can respond back in prayer and I am starting to believe that the two must go together. We need to not just pray, we need to listen and we also can't just listen, we need to respond. A relationship is always based on a two-way conversation and it would make sense that God wants that kind of relationship with us.

knocking down an idol and returning to the living God

"What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you? You desire and do not have, so you murder. You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel. You do not have, because you do not ask. You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions. You adulterous people! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Therefore whoever wishes to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God. Or do you suppose it is to no purpose that the Scripture says, “He yearns jealously over the spirit that he has made to dwell in us”? But he gives more grace. Therefore it says, “God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.” Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. Be wretched and mourn and weep. Let your laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to gloom. Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will exalt you." (James 4:1-10 ESV)

Ever since I can remember the computer has always been a part of my life. My dad is a computer programmer so I grew up around computers and in my house the computer is pretty much always in use. What came with that upbringing was a love for computer games. I was never allowed to have a "video game" system in my house, only computer games. So being a child of this generation I played tons of games. I used to play every game I could get a hold of. I remember when my family's computer was a mac II. I remember playing games on that in my early years of elemetary school. Then we got a pc and that opened up a whole world of new types of games to me. Ever since then, 2 new computers later, I have been playing computer games mostly every day of my life. I was never one of those kids who hung out with other "video game nerds" at lunch and just talked about games, actually I have very few friends who actually play any computer games But I have come to the realization that computer games have become a major form of idol worship in my life. I have noticed the suttle way in which my passions are at war within me. I find myself somewhere, not at home, and having a strong desire and anticipation for when I get to go home and play some new game. It is pushing away my desire for Christ and my desire to love him and others. Therefore, I have decided to quit playing computer games indefinitly. I have recognized them as an idol that I need to destroy. I have noticed that when I begin to have passion for computer games it leads me to begin to seek other worldly pleasures that are not of God, ones that are outright sinful. I think that Satan is using my weakness with computer games to lead me quickly down a road that I should never be on. My ultimate desire is that I can so delight myself in God alone that I will look upon everything this world has to offer and see nothing but trash in comparison to my relationship with Christ, not that everything this world offers is neccesarily trash. There are many things that are earthly pleasures that are from God. I want to embrace those things but I realize that this one thing is something I personally struggle with and need to act accordingly.

So I am declaring my vow to cease playing computer games before all you reading this

my toughest battle

I find myself struggling so much with the daily aspects of the christian life. I hate waking up in the morning and having to fight to find my passion of God I had the night before. I know that the christian life is not about emotional highs, but there are times when I just want to worship God in everything I do but then other times when I fight tooth and nail with my worldly passions and getting to the point where I am passionately pursuing God seems near impossible. A want to have a love for Jesus that transcends all my moods and emotions and all times of day. There are times when I just want to draw near to God and other times that drawing near to him seems like a chore. I just wish there was a simple solution to this.

correctly handling the word of God

Here are two lectures on this subject, the first one is short and the second one is really long but definitly worth the time if you have it

1.Why is it important to take the sentences in the Bible seriously?

2.Hermeneutical and Exegetical Integrity Part 1--Part 2

these really got me thinking a ton about how I read the bible and how I process ideas in my head and even how I write things for this blog

some worship videos from Passion07

Fire Fall Down




Marvelous Light

wow

EVERY christian who wants to reach this world needs to listen to this

Part 1
Part 2

School

Tomorrow I start my senior year of high school so I am excited to see how everything I have learned this summer plays out when I go back to school.

pounded with truth

Today was kinda fast-paced spiritually for me. I ended up inadvertently listening to the same sermon from my senior pastor twice. But that was awesome because the first time I was writing everything down and the second time I got to listen very intently. He talked about scripture and its importance and how it is the life-blood of christians and my church. I went and heard him preach the 1st service then I went to high school group during the 2nd service. In high school group we talked about how important it is to be humble and unselfish in our relationship with others and the challenge presented was to start putting others first just in the youth group to start out so that it would carry to other parts of life. This was something that really convicted me and got me thinking about how amazing that would look if my youth group was composed of people who loved each other in a Christ-like way. The other thing that went along with that was our group being a group that just has plenty of spiritual conversations, this also convicted me and made me think about what it would be like if we could just ask people what God is teaching them every week or something. I began to think about ways for me to love others and look out for them spiritually. So then I went to 3rd service expecting to hear our other pastor preach but it turned out that he was not there today so I heard the same sermon again but like I said, it turned out good after all. Also, during the sermon God began to convict my heart about how I lack in loving my own family and how my pride is getting in the way of me being a spiritual leader in my family. I began to realize that my journey learning to love others needs to start with my family. I need to find a way to get past my selfishness and put those in my family first. This is a task that seems ever daunting.

So it is not even noon yet and already God is hitting me with so much. My afternoon is still a whirlwind that might take some time to figure out. I was spending time reading scripture, listening to scripture and also listening to some sermon podcasts because my ipod is finally working again. I also spent some time just allowing myself more and more to listen to God and hear his voice because that is a major thing he has been showing me over the past few days. I have begun to grow more intimate with God as every day passes and it is too amazing for words, I don't think I could ever put it in words if I i spent my life pondering this relationship. On thursday my senior pastor talked a bunch about how the goal of the christian is the get to the point where you are in constant communion with God and you can recognize his voice. Then yesterday I listened to a sermon that was basically about the same thing. So God has been just pounding that truth in me and showing me how he wants me to know him intimately. It has been amazing, I suddenly have a renewed sense of hunger for God that I haven't had in a long time. I hope to keep this hunger and to keep growing closer and closer to my God who I love.

praying for love

I've been thinking more about how christians should go about loving others and I thought about how Jesus, near the end of his life, asked God for his love to embody future believers. I think christians need to start daily praying for love. Because only God-like love will change the world and God-like love must come from God himself and not our efforts. I am making it a goal to begin to pray often for God to give me love, because if receive God's love, I know that there is a chance people can see Jesus through my imperfect life.

this smacked me in the face today

"Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant in search of fine pearls, who, on finding one pearl of great value, went and sold all that he had and bought it."
-Jesus (Matthew 13:45-46 ESV)

Dave Dravecky

The former MLB pitcher shares his story

Part 1



Part 2



Part 3

something to think about

"love is the new apologetic" -Eric Bryant

a guy's dream

this is a hilarious episode of King of Queens
It was so funny I just had to post it

And I admit it, it may not be right, but this is how guys are

Click here to watch

the way of love

I was watching some videos today about a Christian youth gathering in San Francisco. It saddened me and got me thinking a lot. One of the things that the guy on stage was preaching about was loving people when sharing the gospel but yet one of the things that they did with all the youth was go out to the court house and protest gay marriage and abortion. Then it seemed from the video that they were just yelling at people to just “get Jesus.” First of all I don’t think Christians should be out on the streets protesting, it just doesn’t seem like something I would ever think Jesus would feel the need to do. The youth conference was teaching that the students need be politically outspoken to change the culture around us because it is going downhill to fast and my generation needs to bring some morality. I am still undecided about how involved Christians should be in politics but I just think that trying to change our nation’s morals isn't going to do anything. The truth is that without Jesus, morals mean nothing and you cannot change how someone acts unless you change who they are at the core of their being and only God can do that. But I was thinking about the fact that most Christians preach telling others the truth in love yet we are not seen as loving people. I have even heard it stated that we need to just tell people about hell because the loving part is warning them about the impending doom. I am struggling with this issue because there has to be a balance but it is so hard to find. We must “preach” the word in the classic sense because it was what scripture teaches us and so telling people that they need to repent and receive Jesus is totally and completely biblical. However we must do it in love and I think that most Christians have forgotten what love is. I think we need to be sure we know what love really is. If we look at the life of Christ, he loved by caring for people. He hung out with the poor, the sick, and the despised. He not only preached truth but he went and embodied it by befriending the lowly. I think this is love. Love is caring about people, getting to know who people are, giving up your time to treat others like they are the only person that exists on the planet. I am amazed at how little I put other people before myself. I am a selfish person and this is a huge struggle for me. But the other point is that we should love to love the ones we don't want to love. We shouldn't do it out of obligation because that is not true love. To love someone just because they are human beings created in the image of God Almighty is something beautiful. It is such a tough balance but love has to be first.

Scripture just screams this idea


If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. (1 Cor 13:1-7 NIV)

Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love. In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; if we love one another, God abides in us and his love is perfected in us. (1 John 4:7-12 ESV)

But when the Pharisees heard that he had silenced the Sadducees, they gathered together. And one of them, a lawyer, asked him a question to test him. “Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law?” And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets.” (Matthew 22:14-40 ESV)

Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins. (1 Peter 4:8 ESV)

I sometimes just wonder what it would be like if Christians would just lay their selfishness down, I wonder if I could lay my selfishness down and just love people and care for people and give up my time to treat others like the human beings they really are. You know what the main problem with the evolutionary world view? In that viewpoint, human beings are nothing more than animals. If you say you believe that we were created by God let us treat each other like that is true.

When I say that I want to display the steadfast love of God, this is what I mean, I want to treat and love people like they are people just like me. People with hopes, dreams, desires, and hurts.

Internet Crash

Breaking News: All Online Data Lost After Internet Crash

Cross Talk

cool story posted by Ben Witherington

check it out

who I want to be

It seems like I am suddenly learning some things about myself that I never realized before. I can’t seem to figure why I am suddenly face to face with these things. Maybe it’s just because I am in the stage of life where I am making some big decisions about who I am going to be as an adult. Like my previous post where I was articulating a passion of mine. I think more and more that I personally need to live more passionately. I want to be able to articulate my personal passion and give myself to living it out. I hate apathetic people and I hate when I become one myself.

I googled(my spell checker didn’t like that word) Apathetic and the word definition is:

“Void of feeling; not susceptible of deep emotion; passionless; indifferent.”

I don’t want to be like this but I am caught in that trap constantly. Scripture tells too many story’s of passionate people and the difference they have made to spur me on to be a person full of passion.

I have decided what I will ask God for
This is it:

“May my soul run earnestly after you and continually rejoice in and display your steadfast love”

I want this to be my statement, my prayer of who I want to be

If you ever see me doing something or saying something that displays that I am not running earnestly after God or I am not rejoicing in his steadfast love or I am not displaying it please kindly let me know or yell at me, whatever it takes for me to realize it.


P.S. I am still working on this prayer so I might end up revising it again later, we shall see, I am still pondering all this.

love and my desire

I have been thinking about the love of God. It is just so amazing that his love never changes, that is something that has become foreign in the corrupted version of creation that we live in. Sin has destroyed love. Love has become dependant on the other person’s looks or performance. The bible describes God’s love many times as steadfast. It is completely independent of anything we do or are. This truth gives me a desire and a passion for God. He loved me first so I want to love him back with everything I have. I want God to be my first love, I want to put my love for him in front of my family, my future wife or anyone else or anything else.

I asked God something today

I asked for soul that runs earnestly after him

This is my ultimate desire

Powerful Beauty

Your hand
Holds the earth
You see
The boundaries
Of the universe

The stars tremble
At the sound of your voice
Creation declares
That you are real
And you are glorious

You see wickedness
And you declare justice
But you remember
Those who love your name
And you bring salvation

The heavens
Bow down before you
Yet you know
Your servants by name

You command
The galaxies
Yet you give mercy
To Sinners

sorrow

I was just struck tonight by sadness. I almost feel like crying. I spent some time with a bunch of people tonight and I was listening to their conversations and my heart fell. Just by what sin and what wickness is glorified in the lives of many. It is so sad. It reminds me again how corrupted creation has become. How people now find pleasure and enjoyment in things like sex and alcohol or drugs. We were designed to find pleasure in God alone. I was reading today about how Jesus wept of Jerusalem because he saw the consequences that were to come because they rejected him. I think I felt something similar tonight. I don’t want people to throw away their lives pursuing earthly pleasures when God offers them pure joy.

returning to my first love

I have had a rough time these past few weeks since I got back from camping. I started to drift from my love relationship with Christ and I fell into complacency and began to seek for pleasure in worldly things. It was really rough on my spiritually and now I feel like I have to relearn some things (which is a scary thought). But I have come to realize how far I have fallen backward and I am fighting to get back on my feet. The Lord is just so amazing in his grace and the fact that he is so much greater than any earthly pleasure. I have to keep reminding myself and embracing that truth. It is so hard. There is a famous quote that says that “the hardest thing about the Christian life is that it is so daily.” I think I have come to see that as a powerful truth. It is so hard to daily surrender to God and to wake up every morning and give your day for his glory and just get out of bed running after Jesus. And the more and more I make compromises in my relationship with Jesus the harder and harder it becomes to return to it. I want to know God, to find my pleasure in who he is.

Why Did the Bridge Collapse?

passion

we need to fight, to battle

to live passionately

if not we are wasting our time

Work of Art

every artist seeks to create beauty
a painting
a portrait
a sculpture
a melody
a sonnet
a photograph
a color
an expression

but the great artist has reason to boast
for the massive blue expanse is his canvas
the proud mountains his paintings
the trees are his handiwork
the living creatures his expression
and the chorus for his melody

yet he has revealed his masterpiece
the declaration of his life
the image of his soul
his portrait
the ultimate work of art

Man

Sex God

I finished the book yesterday and i LOVED it


you should read it.

Check it Out

cool nooma video

015 You - Rob Bell

love

God has revealed to me his love in a new way. I just got back from a mission’s trip to Denver, Colorado. It was amazing, I’m not going to talk about all the details right now, but I want to talk about the main thing God taught me this week. I saw the power of love firsthand. Our team did a lot of things related to the homeless of Denver. We got to just love people. I had never really had that perspective on Christian outreach- just Love. But I have found it is the key. Love is the key and the power of Christ. I see what joy it is to just love God first and love people with that love that only comes from Christ. I want my life to be a living example of the love of Christ. I want to just love people for being people. I don’t think I ever saw other people as human. I saw people as statistics, or stereotypes, or projects and not human beings just like me. To see people as human beings completely changes how I relate to people and opens up doors for me to just love them.

“Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law?” And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets.”-Matthew 22:36-40 ESV

the faith of Moses

"By faith Moses, when he was grown up, refused to be called the son of Pharaoh's daughter, choosing rather to be mistreated with the people of God than to enjoy the fleeting pleasures of sin. He considered the reproach of Christ greater wealth than the treasures of Egypt, for he was looking to the reward."
(Hebrews 11:24-26 ESV)

I am amazed by the faith Moses had. I mean how someone can view reproach as greater than the best treasures this world has to offer blows my mind. If I didn’t know what it was like to know Christ, I would put this guy in a mental institution. Moses denied the ability to be called the son of the king of all he new. In Ancient Egypt, the Pharaoh was considered a god. Moses probably knew he had a chance to one day be the Pharaoh and “god.” I want the faith that Moses had, to give up the pleasures of sin with the eternal glory Jesus promises us in view. I think that our amount of faith in God determines how we fight sin. I think that sometimes I sin because I have little faith in God’s promises. I think Moses had a faith that could see God’s reward in a powerful way. I know that when I see Jesus in his beauty; Sin and worldly pleasures seem like dirt. It’s the times when I have little faith and have trouble seeing how beautiful Christ is, worldly pleasures seems so marvelous. I think that when Moses saw the reproach of Christ, he saw the day that the glory of Jesus that would be revealed and would display true pleasure. He was looking forward to the reward of being a friend of Jesus on that day as well as what Jesus promised to give him after that day. I am constantly asking God to help me to not forget the beauty of Jesus, and to remember the truth about what this world really has to offer.

It is time to declare War!

"Be killing sin or it will be killing you."
-John Owen

"we owe the flesh nothing but enmity and war."
-John Piper

". . . there is a mean streak to authentic self-control. . . Self-control is not for the timid. When we want to grow in it, not only do we nurture an exuberance for Jesus Christ, we also demand of ourselves a hatred for sin. . . . The only possible attitude toward out-of-control desire is a declaration of all-out war. . . . There is something about war that sharpens the senses . . . You hear a twig snap or the rustling of leaves and you are in attack mode. Someone coughs and you are ready to pull the trigger. Even after days of little of no sleep, war keeps us vigilant."
-Ed Welch

 "So then, brothers, we are debtors, not to the flesh, to live according to the flesh. For if you live according to the flesh you will die, but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live." (Romans 8:12-13 ESV)

Disciplined

Discipline is something that I have not implemented very much in my life. I have routines, but I am very spontaneous. I have always thought that, when it comes to my relationship with God, I need to always just “want” to spend time with him. I never thought I should spend time with him when I didn’t have the desire to, I felt it was wrong to do it that way. But I have learned that God wants us to be disciplined. He wants us to spend time with him even when we don’t desire to. He wants us to set appointments with him and keep them no matter where we are emotionally. That is true discipline. I have begun to implement some new disciplines like this in my life. I also have begun to realize the benefits and importance of fasting. Before, I never really considered fasting anything special or worth doing. But I have realized that it is very crucial and important to my relationship with Jesus.

this made me laugh

Jewish Olympic Swimmer